Thursday, December 11, 2008

HijinksEnsue Play Snippet

So... I TOTALLY haven't updated recently at all. Sorry for that.
Things are SUPER UBER busy here, I'm getting Grad School applications in right now, two down, (six I think?) to go.
Tomorrow's my 22nd birthday
Next week is finals week.
I'm writing a play based on the www.hijinksensue.com podcasts...
Here's an excerpt from it for your perusal.

The Setting:
Sportsworld, a sporting goods store, located in the southern coastal area of Texas
Characters:
Joel- a clerk at the sporting goods store who has to deal with the idiocy of the customers on a daily basis.
Eli- Joel’s best friend, a stoner who’s constantly hanging out at the store, talking with Joel while he’s working, and passing judgement on the other customers
Various Customers
The lights come up on Joel, a shaggy haired kid in his late teens standing behind a counter, perusing a tech manual on computers
A bell rings as a door opens, and in walks Eli who greets Joel


Eli
Yo Loser! You missed a HELL of a party yesterday… that dude Josh was there and he had lots of … you know… inspiration. Might be just what you need to finally finish that comic you’ve been writing for what… since high school?
Joel
While I appreciate your attempts to (with finger quotes) “encourage” me to finish my GRAPHIC novel… I don’t think weed from some dude you just met at some party is the answer. I just… (Sighs) I dunno… I just need something to happen to me, something new … something less stupid and … Texan.

Eli
Dude… not another rant about how things suck in Texas…
The door opens again and a couple of nerdy type guys (mouth breather types) enter, as the bell rings, Joel like one of Pavlov’s dogs perks up and is instantly the diligent employee.
Joel
Welcome to Sportsworld, can I help you find anything today?
Nerd 1: (nasally)
Umm.. yeah… We’re looking for something like ah uh tennis balls? Those are solid aren’t they?
Joel
No, they’re not solid. (Giving Eli, who’s trying to stifle a raucous laugh, a “do you see what kind of idiots I have to deal with” look)
Nerd 2
Well, we’re looking for rubber balls that are… y’know…
Joel:
… Solid? (Finishing the sentence for Nerd 2)
Nerd 1:
Exactly! Do you have anything like that?
Joel:
We have racquet balls… I think they’re solid.
Nerd 2:
Resplendent! Might we purchase a large number?
Joel:
Do you two even PLAY racquet ball?

Nerd 1:
Uh… no. We need them to put on the end of our spears and arrows.
Eli:
Spears and arrows?
Nerd 2:
(Matter of Factly)
Um… yeah!? For the SCA.
(Under his breath to Nerd 1)
Losers don’t know anything…
Joel:
(While ringing up the nerd’s purchase)
What in the blazing fire of Mordor is the SCA?
Nerd 1:
The Society for Creative Anachronism. The Kingdom of Ansteorra?! Any of this sounding familiar? We’re members of the Barony of the Stargate. Highly ranked actually…
Eli:
Ok, I’m going to stop you there… those things coming out of your mouth? I believe that they MIGHT be words, but they’re not words that make any sense to us normal people… so can you nerdlings get out your dork to human dictionary and tell us in REAL PEOPLE words what you mean?
Nerd 2
The Society for Creative Anachronism, or SCA, is an organization of like-minded individuals who enjoy getting together and experiencing life as we believe it would have been in 17th Century Europe.
Nerd 1
We have people who are craftspeople, knights, nobility… basically anything that you think of.

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